


Pieces

by hunters_retreat



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, John does the right thing, Oblivious Dean, Sam Leaves for Stanford, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-09-19
Updated: 2009-09-19
Packaged: 2018-05-05 05:51:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 499
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5363810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hunters_retreat/pseuds/hunters_retreat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As much as he wanted to explain it, he couldn’t, couldn’t be the one to tell Dean that Sam had to leave because Dean loved him too much, because Dean loved him in the wrong way. </p>
            </blockquote>





	Pieces

 

  
He’d always been able to see it.  He’d hoped, as they got older, the hero worship would disappear, but it never did.  Oh, they fought like cats and dogs, just like siblings were supposed to, but there was nothing that pleased him more than his brother’s praise.  Nothing that hurt him more than his harsh words.

They were all they had in the world and he’d done that to them, even if he hadn’t meant it to be like this.  They were broken, all of them so damn broken, but there wasn’t a thing John could think of that would have made them any better.  Not and kept them together.  Not and kept them safe.  They’d all heal in time, they were stubborn and this one not the least.

When he looked at the duffle on the floor, the papers on the desk, he understood.  He understood and he said the words that both his boys needed him to say, even if they didn’t know it.  “You walk out that door Sammy, you never come back.”

The look in Sam’s eyes though, the fury that this sort of fight always brought out in him, wasn’t directed at him anymore though.  It was directed inward because he knew he had to leave, knew he’d never be able to walk away if he didn’t go now and as much as Sam loved his brother, he never wanted him broken like this would break him.

Dean gasped behind him, the words knocking him backwards, but John just held himself straighter.  “Dad... you don’t mean-”

“You leave us now,” and there was no question who they were really talking about even if Dean didn’t know it.  “don’t come walking back.”

He saw the tears in Sam’s eyes, saw the way they drifted to Dean and lingered for too long, softened too much for a younger brother leaving his big brother behind.  That was the whole problem really.  When he looked back, Sam’s resolve seemed to firm.  “I won’t come back.”

He was out the door then without looking back, no emo moment of looking over his shoulder or stopping at the door.  When his boys made up their mind, they did it with gusto.  He looked back at Dean and saw how his world had fallen.  As much as he wanted to explain it, he couldn’t, couldn’t be the one to tell Dean that Sam had to leave because Dean loved him too much, because Dean loved him in the wrong way. 

It wasn’t Dean’s fault his little brother was in love with him.  It was John’s and he’d said what he had to, done what he had to, to let Sam walk away to his new life with a clean slate.  He did what he had to so Sam could have a chance at normal. 

They were all broken.  He just hoped, in time, they’d find a way to put this all behind them and put all the pieces back together again.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the Fall Fandom Free For All, prompt for [](http://danse-amore.livejournal.com/profile)[danse_amore](http://danse-amore.livejournal.com/)


End file.
